Dictator: a ruler with total power over a country, typically one who has obtained power by force.
Has Jobs obtained power over you by force? No he has not. Has Jobs obtained power over his customers by force? No he has not. Can you choose whether or not you use Apple's products? Yes, you can.
Jobs controlled Apple with an iron fist. But you don't have to - never had to - deal with Apple. You have freedom of choice. And tens of millions of people freely choose to buy Apple's products. That's hardly the mark of a dictator or a dictatorship. That's the mark of a successful business.
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