All I want for Christmas is smarter analysis

From John Dvorak:

Data indicates that early Christmas shoppers are preordering the Amazon's new Kindle Fire tablet faster than you can say “Tickle Me Elmo.” Various tablet computers will top nearly every Christmas wish list. Therefore, it is very likely that Apple will roll out the iPad 3 by the holiday.

No it's not. The iPhone was on an annual cycle until that cycle was extended this past year. The iPad too is on an annual cycle. Apple is not putting out a new iPad only six months after their latest model.

The iPad and Kindle Fire are not the only hot tickets, either. HP seems to have “found” more of its tablets, which it will continue to sell for $99.  

You're kidding, right? The HP tablet has been discontinued and is being sold off to deplete inventory. That's what you call a "hot ticket"?

A lot of people thought the pad would be all they would need, but finally bought a new laptop computer as a more sensible traveling computer. 

I'm sure some people have done that, but a "lot of people"? Proof? Source?

The Apple mavens demonstrate this the best as they often own each and every Apple product—a phenomenon that tends to skew numbers and foil market research. They have every iPad, every iPhone, and at least two Macintosh computers. 

For God's sake, John, just retire already. Not only are you embarrassing yourself, but we're all embarrassed for you.